$7,210

Remember this picture? Nice yard, eh? The kids want to keep it as a prairie. The law says it needs to have a few less weeds.
I called a couple of landscape companies to give bids on what it would cost to get the yard into livable condition. Not show condition. Not stun you neighbors condition. Just passable. Back to bare bones we can plant our own plants condition.
The first bid came in today.

$7,210

EEEYIIIKES!

That's 7 Grand to haul out weeds and dump some dirt on the lawn. Then come back in the spring and sprinkle some seed on the lawn to fill in the areas where they would fill in holes.
We may be in the wrong line of work.

Pumpkin patch

On Friday, we went to the pumpkin patch with our friends. What a fun day. We started with a tractor ride out to the pumpkins, where there were lots of perfect pumkins to choose from. It was a tough decision, but we managed to get 3 good ones home. After loading them into the car, the kids played in the hay maze, the playground, the haystacks and got to see the goats and chickens. It must have been an excited day because K went into labor the very next day and delivered a beautiful baby girl!



E has a new talent. Actually, he's been working on climbing a long time. Since before he could walk, really. But he just learned how to get up on the chairs without tipping them over. Is this not the look of pride in a job well done?!

Why I haven't taken as many pictures lately:
He grabs the camera everytime I bring it out. And he doesn't make a happy face when I don't give it to him. Make picture taking mayhem.
"Doggie" is his word. I think he says daddy too, but it sounds just like doggie, so you have to go by context. He signs all done. But mostly, he walks around chanting "doggie" He says it really clear to! From the time he wakes up, till bedtime, "doggie." I'm happy he's talking, I just hope he expands his repetoire soon. Parents, they're never satisfied, eh?


The backyard of the house down the street. In front is the "grassy" area. It was probably once just the regular green grass run of the mill yard part. Through the right hand gate is the garden area. Behind the greenhouse are (I think) 3 apple trees. We tasted them and they are yummy! Through the left hand arbor gate is the deck and hot tub slab. We'd probably forgo the hot tub, but it would be a great patio, and the deck has a bench which you can see the back of. There is a fire pit set up on the deck too. Not sure if the owner would take that or not, but there is a brick area all set up for it. I called a couple of landscape companies today to get quotes on bringing the yard back to neighborhood standards. I'm really curious what they'll say. We wouldn't hire it done I don't think. It's just to help our case in making a lower offer. IF we make an offer. (See Honey, I said IF. In all CAPS!)

Good day

Today started out slow. Real slow. At 11 when my friend called, I was still my pj's. I was planning to take a shower when I put E down for a nap. I prefer to shower without his help pulling the curtain open. Anyway, I threw on some clothes since she was on her way over. I spend maybe 3 minutes handstitching a repair on her wedding dress she's selling.
Made lunch, read some. Considered doing some housework so I loaded the dishwasher. Yay me! And I put the roast in the crockpot. I find it easier to cook dinner earlier in the day. It sounds better then.
But the really good news is 2 fold. First, I finally found the listing agent on the house and she called me back. She is one person who actually seems eager to sell the house! I have entrance codes for the house so we can go check it out and have it inspected whenever we want. Hopefully we can get an offer in ASAP for the bank to start reviewing. Finally is feeling like this might happen!
Second, my sewing machine has been in the shop for 2 1/2 weeks! And they just called saying it's done and I can pick it up. Of course, they tell me this AFTER C is already on his way home, having forgotten his cell today. Oh well, tomorrow. Then I can start sewing M's costume. Think I'm cutting it close? Maybe.
I'm just excited to start making myself some clothes that fit!
Oh, and if you are in the Portland area and would like to make up some blankets (or have extras) Legacy Emmanuel Children's Hospital needs baby blankets. Email me if you'd like to donate, or just drop them off there. They can be made out of pretty much anything, just standard baby blanket size.

Here they come

The catalogs have started to descend upon us.
Since the first one arrived on Saturday, the boys have fought over it back and forth. Now the second one is here. If you don't count Nova's catalog that comes earlier in the year. I'm sure its the beginning of the flood.
I hear chants of "an' I wan' ______". Or, "Mom, come look at this!" Yes, I already looked at the catalog dear. And no, I don't need to look at every item 15 more times just to verify that it is a wonder of a toy. Yes, I'm sure it would be lots of fun and entertainment. But, in concert with the 15 million toys we already own, and the complete inventory of that catalog that you also want, I sincerely doubt it would ever get touched. Much less remembered.
I have contemplated for weeks now dumping all they toys that get scattered and ignored, or even the ones which reside quietly in the closet upstairs. So quiet in fact I'm not sure the boys remember they own them. What if I just had one very teeny box of toys in the whole house? I imagine they would really and truly play with those toys. Or continue to play with the cushions and blankets and pots and pans and boxes they find lying around. Well, lying around because they played with them this morning and no one picked them up.
I do have a kitchen toy ban. Meaning no toys in the kitchen. I consider it a hazard to have small toys underfoot when I'm carrying hot dishes and knives! And every evening after dinner all the living room toys have to be back in their bins. We do pretty well all things considered. But I wonder what our living room would look like if I could spend that evening time folding the laundry that has taken up permanent residence on the black chair instead of hovering over the toy and kitchen cleanup. And would there be fewer squabbles if the living room and bedroom and stairs and hallway and closets were not littered with toys. One thing I learned in my degree program was that, in setting up an environment for early childhood, less is more. Children get overwhelmed by too many choices. Leaving open space and just a few toy selections leads to children playing more actively and with more focus.
So why can't I just bite the bullet and do it? One big box (or 5) and one big shove out the door. Really, that's it, right? And I know that with Christmas coming, it's not likely people will give the gift of cleaning out the toy stash. I'm guessing it's going to be more of an add-to-it proposition.
In fact, I'm getting ready to make up the boys' wish lists. Because I'm crazy. And I'm their mom. And Christmas is for fun, right?
I am trying to not be too bad though. I am going to ask that they boys receive the minimum number of toys. Yes, it's fun to open lots of packages, but I'd rather they associate Christmas with being with family and feeling that good feeling than think it's all about the loot. That way, too, I can feel good about buying one quality toy that will last rather than lots of cheaper toys that will wind up in a land fill before next Christmas is even considered.
The other thing we plan to do is Christmas for a family. We have done this in years past and it's so much fun! We find out about a family that may need a little extra help this year and gather up a box full of things we think they would enjoy. Our energy of buying and wrapping and doing gets thrown outside of ourselves. We then drop off the box at the house, knock and run. No one ever knows it was us. We never got around to doing it last year. The difference we noticed was pronounced. The years we have done a secret Christmas there has been a lot more joy in giving. Last year there was just a whole lot more "gimme's" and "I didn't get's". It was sad. So, this year, definitely going back to that tradition!
So, if you get less from us this year, know that our resources probably went to a family that needed it. And it went to teaching our children that Christmas is about service and doing and giving to others. We will still have lots of love left for you when we get together. Maybe even more because of the small stack of brightly wrapped gifts. 'K?

That's gratitude for ya

G is a very grateful child. He says thank you for lots of things in his night time prayers.
Case in point: Tonight, he was looking around the room coming up with all kinds of things to be grateful for when E popped up and spit in his face.
"Thank you for playing with E and he spits in my face."

To my fellow shopppers

Yes, these are all my children.
They are all, all three of them, brothers. Real brothers. Just watch them fight over the best place to watch a movie.
They are from Heaven. Same place all children come from.
I am their real mother. I really wipe the noses, tears and butts. I really deal with the "we have no bananas-so-you-can't-have-one-for-breakfast-s". I really feed, clothe and bathe them. I give them real hugs and kisses.
I really love them with all of my heart so much it hurts. They really all call me mommy.

They do have a birth mother. She loves them too. We love her. I imagine I love her in the way a man loves his wife after seeing her give birth and provide life for his children.
Her personal history (and the boys' personal history) is none of your damn business. Are you prepared to discuss your personal and sexual history? All the foods/drugs/substances you take or don't take? The most intimate and personal decisions you've made in your lifetime? Then why are you asking me in the grocery store?

My children know they are different. They see it every day when they cuddle with mom and dad and big brother. They see it as they play with hundreds of toys and books that are all filled with white children. When they see other families who all look alike. When they get older they will deal with the pain inflicted by the asinine assumptions by others that skin colors makes some sort of difference in a person. They have a hole in their heart the size of which most of us can never even fathom. They know what it is like to be born expecting to be loved by the mother who bore them. And then to be raised by another. That is lasting pain. It never goes away no matter how much love and stability they have. That is the loss of a mother at the most vulnerable time in life. Please don't spend our busy time pointing all of these things out to us.

I have lots of answers about adoption. So do lots of professionals. If you have an honest question, tell me. Ask me how to contact me. Give me your number. I would love to discuss this miracle with you and help you grow your family in this amazing way. I do have references for agencies, lawyers and websites. Over the apples when my children are screaming and hungry and tired of being in the store, or in front of my kids period, is not the place or time. If you are hit by a fit of idle curiosity and see us as a freak show, shut your trap. Turn around and head the other direction. I can often tell why you are asking. If you get a snarky answer, well you were asking an inappropriate question. Save your huffing.

I am grateful every day for my kids. I am grateful the Lord trusts me enough to be their mom. But we have typical days. I do not think about how they came to our family every day. They are just my kids. We get up (often too early). We eat breakfast. We have good days and not so good days. Just like you. We have sick days and healthy days. I wonder at the speedy growth of my kids. I cuddle them and love them. We have dinner squabbles and bedtime routines. I get frustrated with my lack of patience and mothering skills often.
They get frustrated with my lack of patience and mothering skills too.
Are they grateful? I don't know. They may not know until they are in their 20's and reach a developmental stage where they can process that. Maybe later. I don't know. For now, they love their mom and dad. They love doing fun things. They don't like being told no. They don't appreciate that they can't have everything they want. They get tired and cranky. They are kids. Do your kids thank you for being their mom and dad? Probably not. My kids are no different.

This is my family. I wouldn't change a thing. Try not to judge me harshly by what you see in 5 minutes or maybe even 5 years, and I will try to return the favor.

The sign in the yard

No, not that sign yet. We're working on it though. Anyone want a cute house in a great neighborhood with 3 bed/2.5 baths and cool backyard? Ask around. Please??? :)

No, the sign I'm talking about was suggested by M last Monday. We'd had a bit of a rough day. It happens. But M was apparently fed up with his sad position in life. He called me back up to his bedroom that night.
"I just want to let you know that I'm putting a sign in the front tomorrow. It will say, '9 year old child lives here. Needs new parents.'"
I expressed that we would miss him and wished him luck. I may have suggested too that he ask around Village Home the following day. "There's lots of really nice families there."

Gah, I'm so not a nice mom. Maybe I'd better start a therapy savings account for him now, rather than a college account.